1. How in-character was this fic? 7 It was hard for me to get the personalities of the characters with how the story was written. It didn't really seem to focus much on the characters but the myths you chose to drop them in.
2. How well did this fic handle the prompt? 6 I got how they were traveling through history, or at least some mythology, but I was lost on the doomed to repeat part and the Team Dark aspect.
3. How much did you enjoy this fic overall? 3 The time skips were often confusing because there was nothing that seemed to mark them as being time skips. I often had to reread lines to figure out what was happening. The paragraphs often changed subjects without any type of transitional. The same thing happened with the dialogue. There were times that I couldn't understand who was talking. (I noticed a wrong word used too, 'break' instead of what I assume you meant 'breath'.) In addition, the whole thing kind of seemed to be missing a plot. I really didn't understand why the characters were actually doing most of what they were doing. Unfortunately these issues (some of which can be contributed to how the story was posted and thus easily fixed) made the story hard to immerse myself in and enjoy.
Sorry. I hate to be harsh but I want to be honest (since I know from experience that receiving honest critique is the best way to become a better writer). I was also pretty confused/shocked because the way the story was written is so different than many of your other stories that I have adored and loved reading. It seems like you have a really neat concept for your story, but the execution was lacking. (Olympics time crunch?) I would be happy to read a rewrite.
no subject
It was hard for me to get the personalities of the characters with how the story was written. It didn't really seem to focus much on the characters but the myths you chose to drop them in.
2. How well did this fic handle the prompt? 6
I got how they were traveling through history, or at least some mythology, but I was lost on the doomed to repeat part and the Team Dark aspect.
3. How much did you enjoy this fic overall? 3
The time skips were often confusing because there was nothing that seemed to mark them as being time skips. I often had to reread lines to figure out what was happening. The paragraphs often changed subjects without any type of transitional. The same thing happened with the dialogue. There were times that I couldn't understand who was talking. (I noticed a wrong word used too, 'break' instead of what I assume you meant 'breath'.) In addition, the whole thing kind of seemed to be missing a plot. I really didn't understand why the characters were actually doing most of what they were doing. Unfortunately these issues (some of which can be contributed to how the story was posted and thus easily fixed) made the story hard to immerse myself in and enjoy.
Sorry. I hate to be harsh but I want to be honest (since I know from experience that receiving honest critique is the best way to become a better writer). I was also pretty confused/shocked because the way the story was written is so different than many of your other stories that I have adored and loved reading. It seems like you have a really neat concept for your story, but the execution was lacking. (Olympics time crunch?) I would be happy to read a rewrite.